Christmas Gift

The number 1 gift for Christmas is Christ. 

The number 2 gift is what B got me.




9 piece brush set with travel case.




 

Advantages to a Crossdressing Husband

Difference Between Men and Women

Although Crossdressers will be somewhere in the middle, or to the left one day and to the right another.

Typing

Since I can't figure out how to get the picture to post, check this out:

http://whut-the-fuck.tumblr.com/post/5642041006/typing#notes

Yes I do type that fast as long as the keyboard works....

Candi

Painted Nails

Daughter and I drove 6 hours to my families house for Christmas.  B had to work.  Of course my family doesn't know about Candi.  It was a good trip.

It was funny because one conversation my family had was about someone my sister knows that shaves his chest and how they didn't understand that.  My daughter didn't say anything (she's a good girl).  I just had to keep a straight face. Also the whole time we were out there I had to hide my red painted toe-nails.  That was a chore.  Now no-one noticed my clear shiny  fingernails.  The toes would have definitely stood out though.

We got back tonight driving through the blizzard of North Texas.  I shaved my chest tonight.  Not sure why I didn't do it before leaving, but I didn't. 

It's good to be home and see my sweetheart.  Love her so much.

-Candi

Bras

My wife once told me that under-wire bras are the worst.  She said this as she pulled the wire out of her bras.  After wearing under-wire bras, I whole-heartedly agree. :o)

Hugs,

Candi

Monday Night

For the past 3 months I have been letting my hair grow out.  Ultimately it was for Locks of Love.  They make wigs for kids that have cancer and lost their hair.   It had to be 10 inches long before they would take it.  It was probably 4-5 inches yesterday.  Unfortunately, I could not style it and it was not nice.  So B agreed I should cut it.  I wanted to get it long and leave it for a while, but it just was not to be.  I got it cut yesterday.

The more I dress, the more I really like to dress. It gives me a comforting feeling when I am dressed.  Monday night was so much fun.  There were probably 10 girls there.  Many I had met before and a few I hadn't.  We talked and laughed.  We decided we could start  a basketball team :o).  And I found out I have the biggest feet of all of them :o(.  Pain in the ass to find shoes

Monday night is karaoke.  And being almost Christmas, I sang Santa Baby first. 


One of my favorite bands in college was Guns n Roses.  I sang Sweet Child of Mine.



I did an OK job on GNR.  That made me not so happy.  I thought I would do a better job.  At least I do a good job in the shower.

The last song I did was George Michael I Want Your Sex.  Loved that song in high school.




You know.  I did a good job on this one.  Maybe I will stick with George Michael in the future.

I was going to try and make New Years Eve but I don't think I will be there.  Definitely plan to make January 5 in Denton for the Chix concert.   It's going to be fun.

-Candi

Born This Way

I had an interesting conversation with a coworker the other day.  There is a girl at work going through transition.  I'm not sure where she is at in her transition, but she is "all girl".  The best body money can buy.

The conversation I had with my coworker was about her (in general) but anyone who transitions really.  She said that the girl was not a girl.  So I asked "does what is between your legs determine your gender."  She said yes at first and the conversation changed to other stuff.  One time my uncle many years ago said it was your X and Y chromosomes that determine your gender.  Well, I think they are both wrong.

TLC has a show called Strange Sex and did a segment on Gender Issues. 

This girl was born female (complete vagina and everything), but has male chromosomes.  Is she female??  Yes.  Obviously there is not a simple definition to go by on gender.  Take that into consideration when looking at other people.

-Candi

Sex Appeal

Crossdressers (OK just me.  I don't know about everyone other crossdresser in the world) want to look like a woman and be sexy.  They want to walk and talk like a woman.  They want to get their makeup right and eyebrows shaped like a woman.  They want to PASS.

I was surfing through Netflix and found the Discovery Channel's Science of Sex Appeal.  It appealed to me.  I watched through a lot of it.  Although I disagreed with some of it (regarding evolution mostly) and the fact they really said there are a lot of factors that go into sex appeal, it was a good show.

Now this is how it can relate to crossdressing.  Our desire is to look "more feminine".  This show addressed that.  It talks about he rounded chin, the raised eyebrows, the higher cheekbones, the walk.  All this goes into "feminine".  It was quick to point out that the male reviewers at one point were more attracted to a body shape (super thin waist with wide hips) that is not found in nature.  However, we will create that with a nice corset. 

Something B and I used to say when looking at houses was "a little paint and a porch and that would be  a nice house."  After watching (most of) that show, make-up will do wonders for you.  Check out Kevin Aucion's book Making Faces ; I learned a lot and loved everything he talked about.

Check out the Discovery Channel show.  I know you will be Very Sexy in the near future.


-Candi

I Have The Best Wife

Yesterday our daughter was out most of the day.  On Monday nights a group of girls get together for karaoke on Dallas.  Lots of fun to just get out.  However, we had plans to go to a Christmas party with B's 2nd job. 

B ended up having to work after all we we could not go to the party.  Daughter was out with a friend.  I thought about going to karaoke.  Then I realized that I could go on the cheap but it would still be a $$ outlay.  I decided to stay home.

B said "You should dress since it's just us here."  She was working in the office.  I put my makeup on, a black skirt and the blue button up shirt looked real good.  After B finished working we laid on the couch and watched The Invention of Lying. 

Yes my wife is the best.

-Candi

Hair Hair and More Hair

Just like any girl, crossdressers want virtually no hair from the nose down.  We don't want facial hair.  We don't want chest hair (or for me chest and belly hair).  We don't want back hair for sure.  We will shave our under arms.  We don't want leg hair.  And as for pubic hair....well cut short but not shaved.

 First things first, don't use Nair hair remover on your chest.  If it gets on your nipples, they will hurt for a few days.  Next, I think hair grows fastest from top of my head to slowest at the bottom of my legs.  My face needs to be shaven at least every other day.  My chest at least once a week.  Legs a week and half.  Maybe it's because of how far from my heart.  Maybe not. 

I know some girls that wax their chest.  I really don't like pain so that ain't going to happen.  Shaving my legs is quick and easy.  Shaving my chest isn't necessarily quick, but not hard. 

Of course laser or electrolysis is an option.  But it's a costly option so not going to happen anytime soon. 

So right now I will continue to shave.  You should do the same.

-Candi

 

Why Crossdressers Make he Worst Husbands

A previous post was why crossdressers make the best husbands.  Insightful and wonderful if I do say so myself.   I do say so. Now it's time to list the reasons why crossdressers make the WORST husbands.  Realize that everything I write s off the top of my head and I will think of more later.   promise.

1.  Shoes.  You thought girls loved shoes.  Well crossdressers LOVE shoes.   I think it's mostly because we don't want to throw on our old tennis shoes and go out.  We want to dress up, not down.
2. Thinking about "her".  She is on our mind almost all the time.  You might think he is cheating on you with her, but it's really not that way.  She is a part of us.
3.  Looking at other women.  Before when your man looked at other women, you knew he wanted in her pants, or was just generally fantasizing about her.  Now your crossdressing man could be doing that OOORRR  wondering if he could fit in those heels.  When he wants to get in her pants, he actually wants in her pants.
4.  2 closets.  B asked me what I wanted for Christmas.  I could not think of anything.  She asked what Candi wanted.  Candi wants new boots, a new wig, and breast forms. 
5.  Surprises - You get in bed and surprise....your crossdresser has on your long gown with padded bra.  You wake up late on your day off and surprise she is dressed to the 9s.
6.  He is always trying to perfect Her.  The voice, the walk, the clothing. 
7.  She is there all the time wanting to be your girlfriend and your boyfriend or spouse has taken a FAR backseat.  You don't always want to do girl things but she does.
8.  Pink Fog
9.  Pink Fog
10.  Pink Fog

Yes there is a reason it is here 3x.  It really needs to be there 20 times.  Or 70x7 times. 

For the GG - Don't give up on him.  Even though she is there, He is there too.
For the CD - Your GG is forgiving of you not focusing on her.  Give her back some guy/girl time.

-Candi

Poker Party

We had so much fun at the poker party at Femme X Studios in Grapevine.  Granted I only won 1 hand and the other girls didn't bet worth a damn on that one.  I was disappointed.  But we laughed and joked and are thinking about doing a roast of Nikki in the future.

The last 2 left.  They ended up splitting the $$.

I would say just the diva in the middle, but they are all divas.

 

 

So it was AWESOME getting out.  I met some new girls.  Hopefully I will see them again soon.  Hopefully Candi can get out on a Monday night before December rolls around. 

 

Have a blessed week.

 

- Candi

Perfecting Crossdresser

There are a few things that crossdressers will focus on improving when dressed.  I guess some would be the same as any girl, however crossdressers don't have the luxury of growing up doing these things. 

1.  Make-up

2.  Hair

3.  Walk

 

Hair is obvious and most crossdressers wear a wig.  Some wigs are good and some are bad.  Invest the money in a good wig.  Save up if you don't have the cash.  Go to a wig shop in a nearby city and get fitted and see what looks good.

Make-up is a little harder for a "starting out" crossdresser, just like it is hard for a teenage girl.  We start slutty because we overdo it, and get better as time goes by.  Hopefully you have a girly-girl SO that can help you learn makeup.  If not, go to a few makeup classes or the makeup counter in Macy's or Dillards. 

Last is the walk.  The girl walk many crossdressers (ME ME ME) are looking for is that slight butt wiggle which will make your dress do the same. There are videos online about how to walk as a girl.  The old adage about walking a straight line...it's close. 

I am writing this one because I am working on my walk.  What's funny is the practice.  I went for a walk with my daughter yesterday.  Walking down the street, I started working on my girly walk.  In doing that I started moving toward the left and kept bumping her.  I played it off saying I wanted her to move over to the side.  I quickly realized I needed to work on this. 

Do a Google search of "how to walk like a woman" or "how to walk in heels".  You will thank me. 

-Candi

Transexual Model

This is an interesting article about Brazil and the transgender models.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hvN_IccSM4&list=PLC4FDC39F67466711&index=5&feature=plcp

Monday Night Out

We had so much fun Monday Night.  It's a normal get together at Sue Ellen's.  Chat, Kareoke, laughter. 

Yes I can play pool and I will kick your ass...big time.  I'm looking forward to the poker tournament coming up next month. It should be a blast.

-Candi

Getting Made

I've read on crossdressers.com and other sites that if you are made as a crossdresser, it will probably be my a teenage girl.  I have proof of that. 
Today we had an open house @ work.  This is special because our company has lock-down on who can and can't get in.  It's funny because the computer company I worked for a few years ago could be accessed in so many ways. 
Anyway, every year we have an open house and get to decorate and hand out candy to the family kids, etc.  It's a great time.  My team dressed up like old Vegas gangsters.  And I (being just a little adventurous) added to my costume.  No I didn't go as a show girl....that would have been SO MUCH FUN.  I still need to lose 20 pounds to make it though.  No under my slacks I wore my thigh high stockings and garter.  Not a big deal, right. 
Well.....I had just put them on before work, had my suit on but not my shoes.  All you could see of stockings was my ankles and feet.  My daughter comes in and within 2 seconds says "are you wearing panty hose?"Luckily I can think quick and said Yes because it's so cold outside today. Although my daughter knows and has taken the stance of "don't ask don't tell", I don't want to push her.  There is your proof that if you are made, it will be by a teenage girl.

As for the Open House.  So much fun.  However, just a few things.  One, I am glad my daughter is grown up.  Those little kids wore me out. Two, stockings get hot with all that moving around.  After the party, when I was sitting and working, it wasn't a problem.  Three, I love the feel of stockings and specially the garters.  Feeling them when I run my hand down my leg is amazing.  Yes dressing is partly sexual for me.  But just partly.

On another note, I wore my dress shoes with a small heel today.  My leg didn't hurt much at all walking around.  And it has really hurt all day.  Got home and took the shoes off and it started hurting  So I put my 3" white heels on tonight to walk around the house.  I'm more care here with heels because we don't have carpet and they slide easily.   I had a massage therapist say she had major back problems and the week before surgery her and friends went to by 5" "hooker shoes" and her back problems disappeared.  I might just try that...even though I am 6'4".

-Candi

Why CDs make the best SOs

If you don't know, SO stands for Significant Other.  This could be spouse or boy/girlfriend.  You know what I mean.  Don't play dumb.  This post is why a crossdresser makes the best significant other.  Let me see how many I can name, and you can add to it when you think of more.

1.  You can share clothes (and not just him stealing yours).
2.  CDs are more in touch with the femininity and therefore are more in touch with he women in their lives.
3.  You can talk about your feelings or emotions with a CD and we will actually listen.
4.  We like to occasionally get dressed up and get out of the house like you do.
5.  Shopping for shoes is fun for us.
6.  Shopping for purses is fun for us.
7.  Shopping is fun for us. :o)
8.  We want more intimacy during sex. 
9.  We want a REALLY BIG closet to share.
10.  Bubble baths, pillow fights/talks, painting nails and sleep overs sound divine.
11.  We are looking for acceptance in this world just as you are looking for acceptance.

-Candi

Tucking

I have put off this post, but think it's probably time to write it.  I do not tuck and probably never will.  Maybe I don't wear dresses that are so tight and/or revealing that I would need to tuck.  Maybe I just don't care.
Tucking is pushing your penis back between your legs so you have that "girl look" in front.  Really I think if you get the ticking right and it stays tucked then it would look like a camel toe. 

Here is a long post on how to do it.

Here is a video where one girl "um" tells you how "um" to do it.




Maybe with the gaff or pantie hose, but NEVER with tape.  So I'm average size although by balls must be big because I can't get them into the "cavity".  However, for those girls that want to go all the way, have at it.  And good luck. 

-Candi

Human Rights and Activism

I have long said that Facebook and Twitter are not real activism.  As Brian Solis says in this video it's slactivism.  That is, people believe that retweeting or putting something on Facebook of "I support..." or "...is horrendeous" is doing something.  In most instances, it's not.  You have to get involved and give. 

Lastly, It's not only women being exploited sexually (or other ways), but woman are used more. This does need to change. -Candi

Fashion and Fitting In

This is a good article about fashion (really fashion over 50 but works no matter what).  She says "interesting … we're all broadly made out of the same stuff, but what we look like on the outside is what identifies us to everyone else."

As a crossdresser, I want to "fit in" with other women when I am out, in whatever setting I am in.  Basically be invisible.  HOWEVER, there is that part of all of us that wants to show off and be recognized and noticed for who (what) we are. 

Many crossdressers I know just be who they want to be...and that's the way it should be.


-Candi

Care For Your Wig

If you are like many girls, head and feet are very important.  Therefore, you are "always" looking at shoes.  I am always looking for pretty shoes that are in my size.  I actually look at other shoes too, and just wish.  But at 6'4", I know I have big feet.   As for shoes, find 4 pairs that fit and you love.  Sandles, heels, boots, flats, and another pair of heels ;o)

As for the other end (your head not your ass), you want a GOOD wig.  YOu don't have to spend $150+ for a wig.  Anybody that tells you that is screwing you...and not in a good way.  Under $100 is an easy match for a wig.  Don't buy a wig from a halloween costume shop.  It will look like a costume and it won't last but a few wears.  Unless of course that is what you are wanting.  One of the girls in my group dresses anime.  It's not for me, but works for her.

Go to a wig shop if you can.  You can buy online, but you may not like it when you get it and have to hassle with sending back (if you can).  As Richard Geer says in Pretty Woman, "stores are not nice to people, they are nice to credit cards."  You might get a bitchy place, but trust me, it's going to be a sure thing in any city.  As the local Tri-Ess group for recommendations if needed.

I didn't stray too far from my natural color.  I have brown hair and the wig I have is a golden color.  Actually the 1st one was black and straight.  It was a goth look.  Not terrible but not what I wanted.  My next wig will probably be brown with some nice highlights.  I want the next one to be straight and longer.  Here is a gorgeous look http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9r6r54T6u1rde8c1o1_500.jpg.  Just not in red for me.  I love red-heads, but not on my head. 

Lastly is care for your wig.  Go to Sally's Beauty or wherever and guy a head to stick it on.  IF you want it put away, I put mine in a coffee pot box.  Fits perfectly.  While you are at Sally's, get some wig shampoo and conditioner.  Here are instructions on washing it and when. http://www.headcovers.com/care_wigs.php

Washing instructions will vary, depending on if your wig is human hair or synthetic.  Most wigs are made of synthetic hair, allowing for the easiest washing and styling.  Determine if your wig is synthetic or human hair and follow the appropriate care instructions below. SYNTHETIC WIGS:  Gently brush the wig thoroughly with a wig brush. Add one tablespoon of wig shampoo to a sink filled with cold water. Immerse wig for one minute and agitate gently. Do not rub. Rinse the wig gently in cold clear water twice or until thoroughly rinsed. Blot the wig gently with a towel. Do not squeeze or wring. Apply conditioning spray very lightly over wig, spraying 10-12 inches from the wig. Allow the wig to air dry on a slender object like a can of hairspray or a shampoo bottle covered with a hand towel.  Styrofoam heads may stretch the cap. Do not use a hair dryer. Air dry only.  You may gently style the wig with your fingertips. Brush wig only when completely dry. Do not allow the wig to dry in direct sunlight. HUMAN HAIR WIGS:  To achieve a natural appearance and unique color variations, all human hair wigs are chemically processed.  To give your wig the longest life, it is very important to use sulfate-free hair care products that are specifically made for chemically processed hair.  To wash your human hair wig, follow these steps: Detangle the wig using a wig brush or comb.  Start at the ends and work upwards to the base of the cap. Rinse the wig in cold water, with the water flowing in the same direction of the hair to avoid tangling.  Do not soak your human hair wig in a basin.  This will cause the hair to tangle and mat together.  Using your fingertips and phosphate free shampoo specifically for human hair wigs, distribute the shampoo evenly throughout the hair. Rinse with cold water to remove shampoo.  Rinse so that the water is flowing in the same direction as the hair.  Remove excess water by gently patting with a towel. Do not wring or squeeze. Condition the wig with wig conditioner, using your fingertips to distribute the conditioner evenly throughout the hair. Remove the conditioner by rinsing with cold water.  To remove excess water, pat gently with a soft towel.  Do not squeeze or wring.  Allow the wig to air dry on a folding wig stand or a tall can of hairspray.

Oh, I know make-up is every important.  Practice, Practice, Practice.  I'm getting slowly better.  So can you. -Candi

Lana Wachowski (previously Larry)

The Wachowski Brothers are great film auteurs.  Their most notable (in my mind) is The Matrix trilogy.  Larry got a sex change (well she is transgendered. We are not clear on the change and it really doesn't matter). 
I like her line in this article in which Lana said, “I chose to change my exteriority to bring it closer into alignment with my interiority. … I know that many people are dying to know if I have a surgically constructed vagina or not, but I prefer to keep this information between my wife and me.” (Larry and his first wife filed for divorce in 2002; under the new identity Lana married another woman.).  Read the article and tell me what you think.

Read more: http://entertainment.time.com/2012/09/10/the-wachowskis-cloud-atlas-at-toronto-unique-and-earthbound/#ixzz26NoQDRxB


Here is directors commentary on the movie.  Lana is (of course) in the middle.  I'm glad she is "out" but really like that she likes her privacy and isn't looking for a lot of attention for her "alignment".  Basically saying "this is the way I am.  deal with it.  I don't have to talk about it.  It just is."




-Candi

Crossdresser and not gay?

I'm watching Weeds on Netflix.  I'm in the 1st season and loving it.  Great show if you have not seen it. In one of the episodes, the ladies are in a PTA meeting discussing one of the teachers.  He was seen looking at shoes in the women's department.  They wanted to fire him.  One of the main ladies spoke up saying "he's gay, not a pedophile." Then the leader made him out to be the pedophile and bad and they voted to fire him.

1.  I don't think most gay guys shop for women's shoes.
2.  I do think he was a crossdresser (unless married then who knows)
3.  Most crossdressers are not gay.

Unfortunately we are seen as gay or pedophiles.  I don't mean unfortunately in the sense that I would be stepping down to be a gay guy or that gays are sub-species.  I mean unfortunately in that we are labeled wrong.  But then again, I really don't want any label.  I'm just me.

Candi

Helping Hand

The CD community we are a part of here in North Texas is wonderful.  We met at Sue Ellen's on Monday (there is a meetup every Monday).  A little drinking (too much), and some kareoke.  We had a blast. 
One girl who is transitioning had lots of advise for me about where to shop and buy a wig, etc.  What was interesting is I didn't really seek out this information.  I'm not saying I am unhappy she was providing direction, but I think in our (because I do stuff like this too) confidence, we like to show what we know. 
I have a rep on my team who is a car guy.  He LOVES to give car information as much as he can.  I have a techie geek that loves to get into the minutia and provide the information back. 
One of the 1st things I said when we started going outside the house was I expected us to become "mentors".  Maybe I'm a little cocky (pun intended).  After being a pastor and being a supervisor over many positions, that might be what I am called to do.  I just take it one day at a time.
So if you are in Dallas on Mondays, stop by Sue Ellen's and have a drink with us.  You will love the experience.

-Candi

Roles

I have been thinking of my "role" in this wonderful world of ours.  What part do I play in it and how does it affect others.
As a father, I am a provider of security and $$ (not much mind you).  I give comfort when there are hurts.  I give love.  I am a teacher and guide.
As a husband, I am also a provider of security and $$.  I give comfort and love.  I also give sex (as much as possible). 
As an employee, I give my time for money.  I give my creativity.  I show compassion, but don't give love really.  I comfort hurts, but not like I would for my family.
As Candi I don't have an exact role here because she is part time.  I am full time everything else...even an employee because I am thinking about ways to improve work all the time.  I am most of the time "under" Candi.  I wear panties every day.  I wear a nightie every night.  My toes are painted red.

All that though is under-dressing.  I can wear thigh-high stockings under my pants (that sounds great)...in the winter.  Hell no right now Summer in Texas.  I cannot wear make-up or a blouse or a skirt (or even capris) in guy mode. 

My role as Candi might be part-time and that's ok.  Candi is part of who I am.  I'm glad B recognizes that.  I try not to push my boundaries...or better to push past her boundaries.  My role as Candi is girlfriend to B, friends to the girls we meet up with in Dallas (looking forward to next Monday).  Hopefully eventually our daughter will come to accept.  If she doesn't, that's ok too.

I was dressed earlier today, because the house was empty (seems to be a trend huh) and I had time.  I love my Candi time (part-time as it is) and look forward to having more of it.  For the rest of the day my role is supervisor and employee.  I will make the most of each role I play.

-Candi

Traveling for the Weekend

My daughter and I went to my mom's house this weekend.  It was her birthday.  It's a 6 hour trip so we don't do it often.  Of course while I am there, I am "mr. fixit".  My sister lives with her, but isn't physically able to do stuff. 
We had a great weekend.  When I got home though, I had 6 new pairs of cotton panties in my bag.  I asked my wife if she had bought new panties (because she used the bag just a few days before).  No was the answer.  I told her I either somehow picked up some panties (odd) or my sister knows my secret (odder).
So I sent my sister an email.  It said "Hey...I found some cotton size nine panties in my bag.  I was wondering if they were yours since they are not B's.  B thinks I have a very rich mistress on the side :o)."
Then we asked my daughter about them.  Turns out my sister has gained weight and had bought these but never used them.  She gave them to my daughter.  Just didn't tell me about it and put them in my bag.  B and I laughed long about this.  I'm still waiting on a reply from my sister.

-Candi

Lazy Afternoon

I'm spending a lazy afternoon alone in the house before I go to work.  This schedule is really cramping our sex life.  Although B says she likes afternoon sex (and I like sex, period), I would much prefer to get home at night, wind down, and then get down.  I've come to expect that when B says we will schedule sex (something married couples do when you have been married as long as us) for after work, it will only come to fruition about 15% of the time.  On the days I get off at midnight, there is a better chance.  On the days I get off at 130am, there is a zero chance. 
I mowed the grass this morning and got the rest of the fence frame put up.  B and I got some nice pictures taken.  Now her and our daughter have gone to run errands and play around town.  I slipped into my black and white bra (can you really slip into a bra), capris, and purple silk tank top and an older straight hair wig.  I need to shave my legs before work or get it done tomorrow morning. 
I took a short nap.  I got caught up on the post on http://www.myhusbandbetty.com/.  THe book I loved.  The site is good information, but I disagree with the political view.  I'm conservative on most stances.  That's just the way it is. 
For those of you who have "bigger" feet (like me), check out http://www.barefoottess.com.  I bought some sandals from them (actually off of Amazon).  Some of their shoes are god-aweful-ugly, 

HOWEVER, I know some girls at work that would wear them so to each her own.

The doorbell rang.  Uummm....I"m not answering that.  I could maybe get away with the capris (doubtful) but I could not get away with the filled bra, black wig, white sandals.  So I left it alone.  It's kind of like my phone.  I've gotten to the point that I don't have to pick it up every time the notification goes off for text or email. 

So that's the 1st part of my day.  Praying work goes good today.  The day has been great so far.  If you want awesome, sometimes you have to make it :o).

-Candi

The Mind of a Crossdresser

Here is the mind of a crossdresser.  OK actually this is just my mind on this date in time.  If you try to categorize anyone (thank you government) you will be sorely disappointed.  Actually I think we all try to categorize people just to keep them straight in our little heads, however you hinder the relationship you can have with the other person if you pigeon-hole them into a specific role.

There was a REALLY bad storm that passed through last weekend.  Our back fence was completely blown down and electric was off for 48 hours.   The house is fine, thank God.  Neighbors had a tree come up.  Others had roofs lost.  It wasn't nice in our neighborhood.  So I am rebuilding my fence.  I'm doing it myself because after paying our deductible, it wouldn't be worth making a claim with insurance.

So here is the mind of a crossdresser I was talking about.  After working in the hot sun all day, sweating my ass off, mud up to my elbows because it started to rain again, I wanted to come in, take a long hot bath and dress in a comfortable skirt and blouse.  Some lipstick and blush to complete and then just relax on the couch and watch a movie.

I can't say it's always like that.  However I found a nice pair of jean capris and "stole" B's comfy red blouse to wear for a bit before I go to work.  That's my day, or at least early afternoon.  Pray I will not kill myself doing this fence and that it is build so strong this won't happen again anytime soon.  I'm going to look for a used generator soon also. Also, don't judge people and try to put them in a category.  They may surprise you one day in ways you were not expecting.


-Candi

Transgenderism

Nicholas Teich wrote the book Transgender 101: A Simple Guide to a Complex Issue .  Since he works at a camp for transgender youth, he wanted to be able to have a detailed (but not too technical) description of transgenderism, what the kids are going through, and information for parents/family/friends. The book has great ratings.
One of his statements I love is:

Imagine resigning yourself to not ever using the bathroom in a public place. For trans people, this is often a reality. Those who are in transition or do not pass on the outside as "clearly male" or "clearly female" are thrown out of both men's and women's restrooms on a daily basis. Some places provide "unisex" or "family" restrooms, but the majority do not. If a transperson wants to go out and enjoy a concert, sporting event, or simply a day outside the home, he or she must make concessions that most people never have to think about.

 At my work, since we have people who are or have transitioned, we have two "unisex" bathrooms.  They are individual bathrooms that anyone can use. 

Does this fix the issue or just put a band-aid over it and mask the problem.  Like I tell my team, just a few bad apples will spoil the bunch.  What I mean by that is just a few "perverts" (you know who you are) dress up like women so they can get into the women's restroom to harass them (or worse). That is demented because 1. women going to the bathroom is not pretty.  As George Lopez (I think) said, "I eat from that taco stand."  2. if a woman was going to the bathroom for some sort of sexual encounter, I think she would have picked her mate before going in.  Maybe I am wrong, but quicky bathroom sex is not like a White Elephant Gift.  You want to know what you get before opening.

Gender Expression is a huge topic that is NEVER discussed because it is very touchy.  Too much to go into on this post, but how do you want to be seen (gender wise)?  How do you feel?  Does that change day to day? (Yes it does, for me).  There are days I just want to be a girl.  There are other days I'm just a guy.  I know who I am and am happy with that. 

As a friend with many tattoos said "the difference between those with tattoos and those without?  The ones with tattoos don't mind you not having any."  There are so many ways to apply that.

Hugs.

-Candi

Mangina Monologues

This girl is funny.

Kareoke

On Monday nights when the girls get together at Sue Ellen's, there is kareoke.  Now I love to sing.  I sing in church (in the pews, not on stage) and I sing in my car.  Unfortunately, I sing in the key of me.  I have about a 4 note range before it gets bad.  Old hymns, I rock because they are all in the same octive just about. 
I like Christian, Country, and Top 40 music.  A lot of it I can sing to and then they get too high for me and I just can't make it and that screws it all up.
So I want to kareoke on Monday nights.  I know it's not a production, but I at least want to be decent.  An appropriate song that maybe I will sing....Brad Paisley.

Hugs, Candi

Girls Night Out

B and I went to the Monday Girls Night Out in Dallas this week.  I didn't think we were going to make it since B was not feeling good.  I think for me she sucked it up and made the trip.  She was happy she did.
We had a ball.  It was going to be karaoke  but a drag show was scheduled also.  Lots more people showed up at the bar and it was fun.  We got home after 1am (which is really late for us married folks).  B paid a VERY nice complement to the girls that she "wanted to see a picture of them in guy mode because they looked like beautiful women".  That is about the best thing you can say to a crossdresser.
I didn't sing.  I really only sing in the "key of me" so usually not a great idea.  B and I had a good discussion on the way home.  One of the girls said she was married for something like 10 years but had just told her wife last year.  B didn't understand.
We are kind of unique in that B and discovered Candi together and she has blossomed from there.  Many crossdressers hide in the closet even from their wives.  So I asked her what her very first initial reaction was when I said I wanted to shave my legs and chest.  She thought about it for a moment and said "what's next??"
Exactly.  As a crossdresser, 1.  we don't know what's next.  But 2. we do know we love our wives more than anything else and don't want them to have to ask "what's next".  And we know what rejection is like and don't want to be rejected by the one we love the most.

Now let me say this....telling your spouse early in the relationship is the BEST thing a crossdresser can do.  And here is why.  You are keeping a secret if you don't.  You are lying to your wife and to yourself by not telling her.  For example, you and your wife go on a diet together.  Swear to lose 25 pounds each.  You have a strict menu.  But then you go to work and eat pizza and drink beer.  2 months later you have not lost weight.  You never tell your wife.  You lied.  period.
 Now for the wives.  Here is what happens inside the minds of your husbands.
"I will tell her but it has to be the right time and this month is not the right time with everything that is going on."
"We are getting married.  I'm going to stop crossdressing.  I've found someone to fill that void."
"A year of honeymoon and busy preparations to settle down.  I can't tell her now."
4-5 years later: I'm too far into this marriage and I love her way to much to lose her.  If I tell her she will reject me and will be gone forever.  I just can't do that.

On and on it goes.  When we get years into the marriage, we can't bring ourselves to the point of possibly losing the one that has not rejected us, even though we have not come out of the closet.

Here is the thing to remember.  If you don't tell your spouse, you are both living that lie.  She just doesn't know it.  You must free her and yourself of that burden and share all of you.  Give her grace and pray she reciprocates.

-Candi 

Shopping At The Mall

B and I went on a date last night.  I took her to Rudy's BBQ which she has been craving.  We knew Rudy's before Rudy's was cool.  It was an out of the way BBQ joint outside of San Antonio.  That was 20 years ago. Now they have many locations and I took her to Denton for BBQ.  Afterwards we went to Grapevine Mills Mall.
If you have never been to Grapevine Mills Mall, it's a nice place to shop.  Basically many "outlet" type stores (and other stores) in a mall setting.  It was late and we didn't have much time. One of the last stores we went to was JCPenney.
Now I love JCP.  They have some great clothes and good prices.  I think their new pricing strategy is great, although I hear the execution was very poor.
We briefly look at clothing then went to lingerie.  We found some pretty items (A red satin nightie we were looking for a long time ago also).  B was looking for some back support items.  I found corsets.  I've been wanting a corset for a while and now I found some discounted.  Oh stop my beating heart.
I took the 1st one to the dressing room.  I got  a look from the check girl, but just ignored it.  That one was WAY too small. So I went out and got a bigger size.  It was right at 9pm and the store was closing.  I asked to try it on right quick.  "It is closing time."  She didn't look happy.  I politely asked to try it on right quick.  She relented.
Well I could get the hooks done in the front, but I could not twist it to the back.  I figure B would have  to help me with it.  Actually I just need to lose weight.  So I decided against it right now.  Maybe 20 lbs later.
I was dishearten with the response from the check lady.  It was late so I understand that, but this could be a sale for JCP and they for sure need it.  Hopefully I will get better response next time.

-Candi

Tink

My daughter gave me something and it made me think of crossdressers and their significant others. She went to the doctor last week.  When they got home, she gave me a sticker from the doctors office of Tinkerbell.  If you don't know from previous posts, Tinkerbell is my favorite.

I'm proud of her.  My daughter doesn't want to be a part of Candi's life, but she sees it is my life and is supporting. I think this is what some other CDs have in their wives.  The "accept" the crossdressing, but don't want to be a part of it.  Of course that is better than not accepting at all.
From the CDs point of view, we would love a supportive, loving wife that totally accepts our CDing completely.  Let me tell you that "total acceptance" of anything is impossible.
Where I am at with my daughter is a good place.  She has not totally rejected me for this and we can move forward.    Hopefully more acceptance will come soon, but if not, I am good right here.

-Candi

Hot Tub Time Machine

I watched Hot Tub Time Machine yesterday.  OMG this movie is funny.  It is NSFW and if you don't like raunchy humor, you won't like it.  Otherwise, you will love it.  :o)

The premise of the movie is 4 guys whose lives really are in the toilet go on a vacation together and when they get in the hot tub, it takes them back to 1986.  They quickly realize they cannot change anything because of the The Butterfly Effect (Infinifilm Edition) .  But they just as quickly realize they want to have some fun and make some changes. They make a few changes, one of them stays behind in 1986, and they all live happily ever after.

I started wondering if I would want to make changes if I could go back.  And if I did make changes, would it completely change my life today.  Probably so.  I am buried under a mountain of student financial aid.  It's a 2nd mortgage.  I didn't get a lot out of my education, however, I did get a wonderful wife out of college.  If I changed the school and went to a community college, then the debt would be minimal.  But I would not have met B and we would not have a beautiful daughter.  I could have stayed with some earlier jobs and gone up in the company, but I would not have had the experience of preaching.  I could have stayed a preacher in the Methodist church and worked and plodded through it, but then I would not be at my current church which is so much better than any of the past churches we have been members of.

Life right now is not completely easy.  We really don't make it month to month and Peter gets robbed a lot to pay Paul.  But we have shelter that is air conditioned.  We have transportation. We have our health.  I have a wife who accepts all of me and I don't want to change any of the past and lose the present.

Blessings.

-Candi

Couples Time

I am a pastor at heart so I will post scriptures and other stuff related.  Also, I will write post about relationships as I have before about communication.  Well here I go again. 
First to the GG.  Your CD is watching your every reaction to figure out exactly what you think about the elephant in the room.  She is used to hiding this 7 layers down where no one can see her and now she is out.  Without meaning to, your facial expression or wording in a single sentence will destroy 2 days of good vibes between you.
Don't take this as me bashing on you.  I'm not.  It is what it is.  Just realize that you will probably have to supress more than you first realized.
To the CD.  Get the chip off your shoulder and BE with your GG.  Stop being a selfish prick (no pun intended) and realize they want to be a part of your lives (get it, HA).  Yes there are GGs that don't want to have anything to do with your fem side.  i'm not talking to or about them.  For those GGs who are accepting in whatever little or big way, give them props.  They are stepping out just as much as you are. 
If you want more specific advise, B and I are both more than happy to try and help. 

Blessings

-Candi

Tradng Parts part 2

So the last post asked medical science "Y U NO LET US TRADE PARTS".  There are many times we have said that B should have been a guy and (obviously) I should have been the girl.  Though I can tell you that I don't think either of us want to go full time the other way. 

After posting that funny pic, I started wondering how we could change parts.  And then I realized that we would have to be robots to do that.  Think about it.  The pussy is not an external part so to change it out, we would have to have a whole section.  Think about a naked Barbie (the doll not your friend).  The whole part between hips would need to come out.  Well if the guy was going to take that, his would need to come out too.
If you think a little more about it, that would need to happen anyway.  We could have some Doc Johnson strap-on attachments for the penis but that's not why you want it.  Those who want the penis, want it to be part of them.  Those who want the pussy want it to be part of them.  And I'm sure they want it for sexual fun too.  To get the sensory experience, it would need to be a true part of you.

Far from just the transgender scene, changing out parts (easily) would be awesome for medicine.  Cancerous parts can be swapped out.  We can just print a new part if you need it.  If you could trade parts on demand, would you do it (hell yes).   From interacting, most crossdressers would do this in a heartbeat.  It won't be in our lifetime, but maybe sometime in the future.

-Candi

Trade Parts

Sometimes a pictures is worth a thousand words.  B and I feel like this sometimes.

http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/35rc32/

Man Discovers He Is A Woman

I read this story today about a man who went into the hospital for kidney stones and found out he was a woman.  Well, at least that's what the title of the story said.  All over the web that was the title of the story.  However, you have to read the story to get the deeper information.

Steve found out he had female internal organs and a male penis.  He is intersex because he has both.  He has become an advocate for same sex marriages and intergender people.  Stevie (who found out 5 years ago) now lives as Stevie.  I'm sure she got her name and gender changed on her license.  She is still married and her 6 children and wife support her. 



Just a couple things about this story.  The title of "he found out he was a woman".  That's of course just a titillating title to get you to click on the link.  He actually found out he was intersex.  But in our black and white society, we don't want to think about a really small percentage on the edge of the pie graph.  The other issue (well not really an issue) is what do people against homosexuality or even same sex marriage have to say about this??

You can't throw out the X or Y chromosomes argument because she is BOTH sexes from birth.  You can't throw out the procreation argument, because she has 6 children of her own.  Although the story infers it, she did not make the transition from Steve to Stevie overnight and did not make it lightly.

I think we as a society are moving, but maybe we need to get off the blacktop road with white stripes and move into that gray mud.  It's more difficult to move through, but also more exciting.

-Candi 

Communication

I have preached on communication in the past.  Poor communication is the one thing that will screw a relationship up faster than anything else.  It doesn't matter if you are a crossdresser or not.  Open honest communication is needed in a thriving relationship. This is probably even more true for a crossdresser.

Open communication regarding our crossdressing is very very difficult, and here's why.  We have spent so many years hiding this part of us for fear of retribution/retaliation/rejection/any other re- word you can think of, that showing this part of our lives is difficult.  And even if we have an accepting significant other (SO), we are still afraid of letting it all out that we will scare them away (or repulse them in fact). 


On our way back home from vacation, B and I had a good short discussion.  Her friend was not having a good day with her husband.  It was one of those "coming near the end of the line" talks.  She needed to vent.  I asked B if she ever complained about me like that.  She said no, that it was a rarity to complain at all about me and never like that.  It was good to hear.

Our discussion went further.  She said likes Candi but sees me obsessing with everything CD.  I asked her to explain.  She stated that when I am on the computer, almost all the time it's sites regarding crossdressing.  I made a comment that when at work I search work related sites and when at home this is what I search.  It wasn't a good thorough answer and I needed to think about it.  So I did.

I realized that I read a lot of CD forums/blogs/sites for a couple reasons.  1.  I am still trying to figure out who I am completely.  I don't mean I want to figure out if I will transition or not.  There is no way I am going there.  Reading other people's experiences helps me understand who Candi is and how she can be part of my (our) life.  2.  My online habit is my "Candi time".  I just don't have the option to go out right now.  With our daughter and work and lack of money, I can't get out of the house.  So I underdress pretty much every day.  I wear a nightie to bed every night (god I missed that on our vacation).  And when I come home from work at 2am, I put on something feminine and unwind. 

I have not had makeup on since our anniversary.  Missing that.  I did shave my legs last night.  I love that smooth feeling and am so glad that B enjoys it too. I will get time out again soon.  Until then, I will interact with others on crossdressers.com forum and other sites and just be me at home.

Blessings,

-Candi

Beach Body

We are on vacation this week at the beach.  It has been a wonderful relaxing time.  Well most of it was relaxing.  Wells Fargo screwed up my money situation and that changed things around.  No Worries.  I get good at pulling things out of my ass when needed.
I was surprised we didn't spend the whole time on the beach.  B and I both like to people watch.  Our daughter just wants to "go".

We went horseback riding one day.  That was so much fun.  Although I am a crossdresser, I am full guy and they two girls that were leading us were hot, no doubt. 

 I told B I wish I had a body like that.  Actually I said "skinny bitches" first.  She corrected me and said they were just skinny girls because we were that skinny when we were that age (half my age now since I turn 40 next month). 

I'm generalizing here, but the difference between crossdressing men and non-crossdressing men.  non-CD men will look at these girls and their first thought is getting into their pants.  CD men look at these girls and their first thought is "I wish I could fit in those pants". 

Obviously if I didn't sit at a desk all day,  could get a body closer to that.  Now they were over 6 ft tall like me, but if I lost 25 pounds, that would make a difference. I was working out on a daily basis and lost some weight, but got stuck between 215-220.  I stopped for a few weeks and nothing changed.  If I watch what I eat, I pretty much stay here. 

On another note, B and I saw this Oh So Hot dress in one of the stores here.  They had an XL and she was going to let me buy it.  It was XL in the US and 14 in the AUS/UK. I pulled out my handy smartphone and checked the conversion.  That would be size 12 in the US.  Even if the site was wrong and that was a size 14 in the US, it was not going to work.  Skinny Bitches.  I have a size 18 denim skirt that just barely slides up so I know that dress would not have worked.  Maybe it would have given me the incentive to lose the extra weight. 

Here is your encouragement.  You can lose the weight.  You don't have to though.  There is clothing for us girls that are a little bigger.  I know you want to look good (meaning hot) though.  Lose 15 pounds and you will feel so much better about yourself.  Confidence makes the girl, not the clothes.

-Candi

Is B a Girly-Girl

B and I were talking last night laying in bed.  She found a picture of a wedding dress I put in this post.  I saw that look in her eyes.  I let it go, making a mental note to talk about it late.  Well, it was later.

We were laying in bed and it was REALLY late because of my trip.  I asked if she was up to talking.  "sure," she said. I told her I wanted to talk about Candi.  She asked if Candi was being deprived and needed some time.  I love her for that. 

I wanted to talk about the wedding dress.  I asked if it upset her.  B said she was confused about it.  So I went into teacher mode.  The most feminine thing a woman can do (besides give birth) is to get married.  Almost all crossdressers want to experience this in some way. A percentage just want to try on the dresses.  A percentage want to walk down the isle.  And then a few more want to have the honeymoon also (although I would think everyone wants the honeymoon).

Then we started talking about our wedding 18 years ago.  Bs mom planned the location and decorations.  I asked my sister to make the dress and helped design it.  I have always worried that B didn't get to "create her fantasy wedding" like so many little girls want.  She said last night she never had that "dream" that little girls have.  She didn't have the desire to create the wedding. That made me feel better.

She then wondered if the wedding dress I helped create was subconsciously for me.  I told her no that it was created exactly for her and I wanted it to be perfect...for her.  I made points with that one.

"Who would come to our wedding?  I guess the girls from Dallas Feminine Expression."  Then I remembered that one invited all the girls to her daughter's bridal shower.  I guess we would invite other crossdressers and some people we know from the LGBT community.  It was a really good couple's conversation.

Then we started thinking about how she is the guy and I am the girl in this relationship.  That's where this post title came from.  Here is B.  What do you think?
1.  Hates to shop for clothes and won't try anything on in the store unless forced.
2.  Only occasionally wears make-up.
3.  Doesn't wear perfume.
4.  Wears a nighty (or something else "sexy") to bed about 3 times a year.
5.  Has lots of nighties in the closet.
6.  Has 1 pair of heels.
7.  Doesn't have a closet of shoes.
8.  Shaves her legs (when it gets too long).
9.  Didn't have that "dream wedding" plan.


-Candi 

Being Submissive

I'm not a submissive in girl or guy mode.  There are times in "fantasy mode" where B or I will be more submissive.  But the chained up, ball-gag, cock lock, licking the boots, being talked down to is not for either of us.  And I don't really understand it.

Now don't get me wrong.  If that's what you are in to, go for it.  I'm not going to judge your sex life (or your life in general unless you are hurting those you should love).  I do like some "kinky" stuff (but kink is in the eye of the beholder).  I just don't like a lot :o).

I was reading Romans 8 and started thinking about submission.  Check this out:

¹ Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. ² For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death. ³ For what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did: sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and as an offering for sin, He condemned sin in the flesh, ⁴ so that the requirement of the Law might be fulfilled in us, who do not walk according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. ⁵ For those who are according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who are according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit.
⁶ For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace, ⁷ because the mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of God, for it is not even able to do so, ⁸ and those who are in the flesh cannot please God.
⁹ However, you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. But if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Him. ¹⁰ If Christ is in you, though the body is dead because of sin, yet the spirit is alive because of righteousness. ¹¹ But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you.
¹² So then, brethren, we are under obligation, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh— ¹³ for if you are living according to the flesh, you must die; but if by the Spirit you are putting to death the deeds of the body, you will live. ¹⁴ For all who are being led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. ¹⁵ For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, “Abba! Father!”

OK.  So a submissive in the lifestyle sense let (wants/needs) someone else to direct their life.  When it all comes down to it, a submissive doesn't want to take responsibility.  Remember that when I am referring to a submissive here, I am talking about someone who is 100% in it.  I'm not sure how you get to a point of needing someone to direct your life 100% like that.

I put the Romans 8 passage up there to give an alternative.  While reading this, you may (or may not) have to drop any preconceived notion of what Christianity is.  So many people have been hurt in the past by it.  Message me with questions and I will be happy to help (as I can). In the passage above, the "flesh" is what the submissive will let guide his life.  That's his/hers desires, wishes, loves, thoughts will all be guided by the flesh.  Now you can say "it's not the flesh, but my mistress!"  Your mistress is your desire of the flesh.  Don't try to put it off. 

Here is what I want you to see though.  Vs 6 If the flesh is directing you (meaning someone else) then you are really hostile to God and cannot subject yourself to God.  You can only have 1 master. 

HOWEVER, if you are directed by the Spirit (meaning God), you are alive in ways you never expected.  Here are the differences between flesh and spirit.   Flesh=death. Spirit=life. Flesh=hostility. Spirit=love.  Most important in this train of thought. Flesh=subjecting yourself to another.  Spirit=submission to God and ultimately being free.  Oh what an awesome paradox. 

That love, that need, that desire and want you are craving is found in God.  If you are under submission of the Spirit, you are a son/daughter of God.  It's not about sex but about LIFE.  And if you are an adopted son or daughter, you can cry out "Abba Father" and he will open his arms to you.

It might be easy for you to turn away from the one you are in slavery to, but it might be hard.  No matter.  You can't just leave it, because it will leave a big "sub" hole in your heart.  You have to fill that with something.  That something is the love of God through Jesus Christ.

Shalom

-Candi

Retained Job

Good News....I am keeping my job.  The 4 days after the accusation were torture.  I went back and forth between I'm losing my job, I'm keep my job, I'm keep "a" job, but being demoted.  It really was hell (in a career sense of the word".
I did get written up because I needed to be a better supervisor.  I'm good with that.  I just have to stay on my Ps and Qs now.  Focus on the metrics and get the job done.

Of course I need to get to posting more on this blog.  I apologize for the lack of attention.  I do have some "thoughts" bouncing around in this empty head of mine.  I hope to get them on "paper" soon.

-Candi

Lost Job

Well I may have just lost my job.  I can't blame it on the crossdressing either.  Except for underdressing, I keep work and Candi separate.  Even though my company is very liberal in their practices, it doesn't change how people themselves are.
One of my reps accused me of harassment.  That I and others on my team make comments about women, gays, minorities, etc that offend her.  It's a sad day when a crossdresser would be accused of derogatory comments toward gays and any other minority.  But the charges are there and there is an investigation.
I pray it is shown I am clear and can return to work this week.  It will be tough on my and my family if not.  I really don't want to look for a new job when I am unemployed.  I know that is stressful.  Only time will tell now.

-Candi

Shaving My Legs

I shaved my legs last month to get ready for our anniversary weekend.  This was the 1st time I had shaved my legs.  They were really hairy. I have kept them shaved since then.  By doing this, I have learned a few things...about myself and about shaving my legs.

1.  I have really long legs.  Also, under all that hair, they are really white. 

2.  Take your time.  You have probably seen your wife or girlfriend speed through shaving her legs.  That's because she has been doing it for YEARS.  Same with make-up.  You will not be able to take care of your girly business as fast as she does.  Trust me.  Also, the first few times might be an "experience" for you.  It's a very feminine thing to shave your legs and as a crossdresser, it will "put you in the mood". 

3.  Your knees are sensitive.  Be gentle because that will be where you get your first cut.  The 1st time I shaved them, I cut my left knee.  The 2nd time I was being so careful that I missed my knees altogether. 

4.  You know those commercials where the girls are shaving their legs in the shower.  Well as with most advertising, it's BS.  Your shower is not big enough for you to shave in.  Your hot water heater is not big enough for you to shave in the shower.  When you bend over and water is running up your nose, you will not be happy.  When the shower washes off your shaving cream, you will not be happy.  Do it in the bath tub.  Oh...and wash out the bathtub when you are done.

5.  Soak in the hot bath before beginning.  Just like your face, you need the hairs to stand up and be soft to cut.  The bath is an awesome place, and again....soaking will make you feel girly. 

6.  I go foot to thigh shave, but it's up to you.  That will be the easiest.  I know you should go WITH the grain, but oh well.  Sue me.  It works just fine.

7.  Don't use a 5 week old razor on your body.  If it's hard to cut your facial hair, change it out.  They are cheap.  And on that note, clean it after each stroke.  The strokes on your face are short; maybe 2-3 inches.  The strokes on your legs are 12-18 inches.  If you don't shake that thing in the water really good after each stroke, it will clog quickly and be useless.  You also need to clean it good at the end so you can use it again.

8.  Your hair growth rate depends on you completely.  I thought I would be shaving every week, especially since I have to shave my face every day or get a full beard in three.  But for me, 2 weeks is tops.  I like the feel and look so I touch and see every day and know if my hair is growing. 

9.  Use shaving gel.  You can use soap, but that will dry out your skin so use shaving gel.  It's $2 a bottle.  Just like your razors, don't be a cheapskate.  Buy the quad blade razors and a good gel.  It looks expensive up front, but overall it's really not bad. 

10.  Go all the way to the crevice between your crotch and thigh.  Don't leave hair on your thigh.  Also, if you want to shave your crotch, go for it.  The feel is amazing, until it starts growing out and then it itches like hell.  Here is my recommendation for good looks and feel.  Buy one of those electric beard groomers with a guide. I have a big one with 4 guides of different sizes.  It's actually for all hair.  Put the smallest guide on there and cut off all your pubic hair.  Pull your balls tight and cut those long hairs there also.  Put your leg on the sink and go for the back too.  You will like this.
Also, if you have a girl in your life that gives blowjobs, she will appreciate this.  Cut short, don't shave.

All girls are the same.  At 1st she may not like it, then start to really like it when she rubs against it a few times.  When she feels how smooth you are and that you are taking care of it, she will notice, even if she doesn't say so.  B walked into the bathroom last week when I was shaving.  She looked and didn't say a word but rubbed against me for a while in bed that night. 

Lastly, pretty much no one will notice, unless you are always in shorts regularly and around acquaintances a lot.  Everybody else won't give your legs a 2nd though.  If yours are as white as mine, I recommend tanning.  It is that time of year.  Spray tanning is an option if you don't have time for outside.  If you are in FtWorth, I know someone who makes housecalls for airbrush spray tanning.  She does a great job and only charges $35.  Send me a message if you want her information.

Blessings,

-Candi

Nothing better

Nothing better than on a slow Sunday afternoon to sit in front of the  computer surfing in my denim skit and a beautiful blue cami.  It's fabulous.

-Candi

Why Crossdress?

Last one for tonight :o)

Embrace It

Oh So True.

Continuing Daughter Adventures

So my adventures continue.  As I stated before, B told our daughter the whole truth about Candi.  Our teenager said that night to mom "you know the stuff we talked about earlier?  I don't want to talk about it anymore."  It's like having a 2nd wife, huh?  ;o)

Well....She might want to talk about it now.  I get off work at 2am.  To unwind I like to sit in the living room and have a beer.  I will surf a little on the Internet.  Maybe watch a show in hulu or just online.  Sometimes I will put a skirt and blouse on but many times I will put a nightie on.  Well last night I put on B's long red satin nightgown.

This thing is gorgeous and feels awesome.  Everyone else was asleep.  I made some popcorn and started to get online.  Well my daughter came out of her room.  There I am in the recliner in the satin nightgown.  I did the best thing I could....I acted like nothing was wrong.  I didn't say anything different than I would at any other time.  I offered to make her something to eat since she was not feeling up to par.  After a 10 minute conversation, I was done with my beer.  She went to bed and so did I. 

B has not said if she brought it up to her.  Our daughter is great.  Eventually she may decide to be around Candi.  If it doesn't happen it's not a big deal and I will not force it. 

In my mind I think it will go like this...for a while she will not want to have anything to do with Candi.  We will all go shopping and I will pick up something that is clearly NOT for B.  From then on she will be giving me suggestions on what to wear as Candi.  It's a thought (or maybe a dream). 

-Candi

Our Daughter Knows

Our daughter has been told that I am a crossdresser.  She had clues in the past that she knew, but never really put them all together.  It was really me being lazy and forgetful that caused the "outing".

I washed my wig two days ago and it was on the styro-head to dry.  I had it on the shelf in the closet.  I told B about it, and then forgot all about it.  Well B noticed it today while I was out.  I had left the closet door open and it was in full view.  She took care of it, but our daughter wanted to know why she closed the closet door when she was in there. 

They went for a drive to Sonic and had a talk.  She had noticed my shaven legs last week and saw my new pedicure a couple days ago.  I guess I wanted to be caught.  She knew I wore panties almost full time.  B told her I was  a crossdresser and that our anniversary was a full day "out".  She was more shocked that I went out in public than that I was a crossdresser. 

Luckily B took it in stride and our teenager hasn't freaked out on my.  She is a good girl.  I'm letting it all play out and see what she says.  I'm not hiding my toes or legs.  Waiting for her to make the next move.  Only time will tell.

-Candi